Grief Is A Natural Response to A Variety of Life Events: Here are a few…

What counts as an event we can grieve around?

Short answer: anything you decide.

Being a “human” is complex. Grief is complex. We are emotional, feeling beings. Just like there is no one way to grieve, nor two grief experiences that are ever exactly the same – this complexity saturates all of life.

Grief is a natural response to any form of loss.

Here are a few examples of losses that can create grief.

Death of a family member
Death of a friend
Divorce or relationship loss
Miscarriage or still birth
Infertility
Personal injury or illness
Loss of a physical ability
Change in health of a family member
Loss of home
Workplace dismissal
Retirement
Change in financial state
Bankruptcy
Child leaving home
Abandonment
Trauma of any form
Loss of Trust and Safety
Loss of control of the body
Loss of pet
Complicated relationships with loved ones

There are many more losses not listed here. Feel free to add more to the comment form below.

SECONDARY LOSSES

Once we’ve experienced a primary/direct loss (examples noted above), secondary losses are not far behind, and can most often not be acknowledged, although they are very present. They can be present for some time or an extended period of time.

These can include:

Loss of relationships/community/support systems – abandonment, the people you thought would support you are not around due to avoidance, inability to show up, unskilled in what to do/how to show up, busy culture, etc.
Loss of faith – you may find yourself asking: why did this happen?
Loss of health – loss of appetite and activity, inability to function on a daily, practical level.
Loss of sense of belonging – loss of connection with primary loss.
Loss of self worth – loss of connection to self, this can also be connected to should’ve/could’ve scenarios related to the primary loss.
Loss of financial stability – time off work to cope/grieve/heal, inability to function at work, etc.
Loss of hopes and dreams – plans that the loss was a part of, ie: future events.
Loss of identity – who am I now with this loss?

THIS IS THE VILLAGE RESPONDING TO THE COMMUNITY

Just like many indigenous cultures, and in my own culture too – when we experience loss, we gather in safe, sacred space, we share our stories, we are witnessed in our grief. We are not isolated. We practice, we commune with a higher source, we share food. We support one another to integrate our grief, by sharing through our experience of loss, through our practice, and our life skills and trainings – in order to support our community. This is the village responding to the community.

Come gather and tend your grief with us. And remember, all forms of loss are welcome.